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Form Response to a Form Rejection Letter

DEAR CHAIRPERSON,

PLEASE ALLOW ME TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE IMPERSONALITY OF USING A
FORM LETTER, BUT I HAVE RECEIVED SO MANY REJECTION LETTERS THAT IT WOULD PLACE UNBEARABLE DEMANDS ON MY TIME TO REPLY TO EACH INDIVIDUALLY, THOUGH I ASSURE YOU I DEEPLY REGRET THAT I AM UNABLE TO DO THIS.

I WISH TO EXPRESS MY HEARTFELT THANKS FOR THE SERIOUS CONSIDERATION THAT I REALIZE YOU HAVE GIVEN TO MY APPLICATION. I UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR DECISION NOT TO HIRE ME IS IN NO WAY A REFLECTION ON MY MERITS AS A PHILOSOPHER, BUT RATHER A RESULT OF THE UNFORTUNATE FACT THAT MY BACKGROUND AND INTERESTS DID NOT FIT THE REQUIREMENTS OF YOUR POSITION AS WELL AS THOSE OF THE OTHER HIGHLY QUALIFIED APPLICANTS. I, TOO, REALIZE THAT THESE DECISIONS ARE NOT EASY AND I AM COMFORTED BY THE FACT THAT YOU WILL KEEP MY CREDENTIALS ON FILE SHOULD ANOTHER POSITION OPEN IN THE NEAR FUTURE.

IF YOU ARE ONE OF THE PERSONS THAT I HAD THE PLEASURE OF MEETING
WITH AT ONE OF THE CONVENTIONS, I WISH TO EXPRESS MY GRATITUDE
FOR THOSE FEW PRECIOUS MOMENTS WITH YOU. I ASSURE YOU THAT THE
PLEASURE I DERIVED FROM JUST CONTEMPLATING THE POSSIBILITY OF A
POSITION IN YOUR FINE DEPARTMENT FAR OUTWEIGHS MY DISAPPOINTMENT WITH YOUR FINAL DECISION.

SINCERELY YOURS,

DAVID P. DYER
123 CHAPIN
ANN ARBOR, MICHIGAN 48103